Don’t get me wrong, being a girl mom has been the biggest dream come true. There’s pink and floral everywhere, colorful bows and matching outfits, dollhouses and ballet classes. But, what doesn’t let me sleep at night is what comes next.
We always say Karma is a b*tch, right? I’m worried that what I’ve done and how I acted toward my own mother is going to come back to me bite me you know where. Girls and their mamas, well it’s like oil and water for a little while. And it TERRIFIES ME! I am here playing barbies, dressing them up, being their number one coolest gal and it isn’t going to last forever.
I know it will all hit the fan at the first sign of PMS and everyone menstruating at the same time (my poor husband, bless his heart). Then it’ll snowball into mom doesn’t get me. I’m sure I will be the worst human in the world because I laid down the law when daddy wasn’t home. My girls will want to talk to each other and not me. They will dislike what I wear, what I make for dinner, and how I discipline them. I will be that person they like until they don’t and everything I do will be so annoying. Why did I act like this to my own mother??????
I’m not saying I want to be their best friend. Not at that age anyway, but I just can’t imagine these two loves of my life “hating” me, calling me names in their heads, and wishing they could get away from me. It’s coming and I know it and it breaks my heart. You know? The inevitable, it’s coming and for some reason I’m mourning what I’m literally enjoying right this very moment.
I hope that when the haze of adolescence clears they will realize that I was actually awesome and that no matter how annoying they felt I was at times, I am their mom and moms are the best thing in the world. I hope that they will be my best friends and let me back into their circle as young adults. I hope that karma doesn’t bite me in the tush for how I acted to my own mother, the one I can’t event apologize to as I venture in her footsteps. For now I will relish in the moments I have where “because I said so” sticks, and even after they’ve gotten in trouble with me, I’m the one they they run to for a big hug crying “mama!”
Being nostalgic over things I’m still living, if that isn’t motherhood in a nutshell, I don’t know what is!
Hope you’re enjoying your family today!